defence consultants - who needs 'em

Once upon a time there was a shepherd looking after his sheep on the side of a deserted road in the Highlands. Suddenly a brand new bright red Porsche 911 appears and screeches to a halt beside him. The driver, a woman wearing a Chanel suit, Ray Bans and a Cartier watch, steps out and asks the shepherd: "If I can guess how many sheep you have can I keep one?" The shepherd looks at the large flock and says "OK". The woman connects a lap top to a mobile phone, enters a NASA website, scans the field using satellite imagery, opens a database linked to 60 Excel files filled with logarithms and pivot tables, and then prints out a report on a high tech mini printer. She studies the report and says to the shepherd: "You have exactly 1,586 sheep". The shepherd replies "That's correct. You can have the pick of my flock." The woman packs away her equipment, looks at the flock and puts one in the boot of the Porsche. As she is about to leave the shepherd says: "If I can guess your profession will you return the animal to me?" The woman thinks for a moment then agrees. The shepherd says, "You are a Defence consultant." "Correct" responds the woman, "but how did you know?" The shepherd replies "Simple. First you came here without being invited. Second, you wasted a lot of time telling me what I already know. Third, you don't understand anything about the work I do but interfere anyway - now, can I have my dog back?"